I’ve been looking at the comments given on my work, others’ work, and the critiques I’ve given on stories. We all need to improve on CC. Emphasis on we. Yes, I plead guilty to giving ‘bad’ constructive criticism.
We’ve all committed an act of giving bad reviews at one time or another. Some of us may not have realized it. Giving advice and praise on a story is an art in itself. Here, I’ve compiled a basic guide to giving helpful CC.
I will be using an old short story of mine from years ago as an example, because there are plenty of things you can critique about it. Translation: It’s horrible. No judgie. It’s from 2007. I was nine. And I didn’t change a thing, as much as it pained me.
An Elfa female wolf:
A elfa female wolf, Kana and her pack silently stalked an elk. She gave the cue to attack the elk. She and her mate, Conner, ran in front, while Kana’s eldest daughter, Marina, closes the exit from the back and the 15 other pack members surrounded the side escape routes.
They attacked, having one of Kana’s daughters, Sheila, attack from the rear. Kana, Conner and Marina attacked the elk from the front and the other pack members attack from the sides.
The pack came home and soon they gulping down the fresh meat. The firsts to eat were Kana and Conner, then Marina, next Sheila, the adult members, and finally the little leftovers for the pups, Sarah, Mike and Cheryl. When the pack had eaten their fill, there was only bones left because it is a winter where food is scarce. This was the packs’ third meal in a few months. This pack is new and was forced to leave a huge pack, 70 strong but it was impossible to feed the gigantic pack so it split up and divided the territory into small little sections. Most packs in this area are 7 members to 30.
As winter draw to the end the pack started hunting more in the rise of prey and warmth. But the packs’ luxury territory was about to be challenged.
Kana, Conner and Marina and the pack were happily eating a rare moose, a treat, were suddenly interrupted by a eerie howl. As the enemy drew closer, it became clear that it was a large wolf pack was charging. Sheila nervously gathered up Sarah, Mike and Cheryl and hid them. Right after Sheila hid the pups, something shot through a thicket of dew covered pines. A large gray wolf started to growl followed by 23 other members. A small, thin white wolf smelled the pups and started to follow their scent. Suddenly, a black blur covered the white wolf. Kana was not going to let a wolf kill her pups. And a battle started. Conner was facing the big gray wolf, the elfa male of that group, and the white wolf was the elfa female and was destroyed in a instant by Kana. Sheila and Marina tackled a huge brown wolf and soon the other pack was driven off, but the elfa male was still there and had killed Conner. No male in Kana’s group could mate with her, but what about the big gray wolf, Dawson?
Kana’s pack let’s Dawson join but at a cost. Dawson goes and kills the pups, like gray wolves always do. But he does not kill the runt, Cheryl. Why?
Cheryl was lonely at first without her playmates, then she found some one when the pack adopts a wolf pup from another group.
But five years passed when a unknown illness hits Kana, and she dies a slow death, but Cheryl becomes leader.
That’s the end! It makes me cringe. Horribly. But, someone could be really proud of this piece of work. Remember that.
Rule I: Treat others the way YOU want to be treated.
Sounds like the poster on your kindergarten teacher’s wall, eh? It applies to everything- whether it’s your opinion on Billy Bob Joe’s new sneakers or reviewing someone’s writing.
This is obvious, but still. “This is worse than cleaning your bedroom. You’re a failure.” We, as writers, already THINK that. No need to do that for another writer. We all got that beast in our head. Did you know that clinical depression is higher in writers than in the rest of the population?
Rule II: Always say at least one thing nice at the beginning of your comment.
At school, we use the 3/3 rule: three things we liked, three suggestions. But, that’s too hard, because we’re allowed to go over with the compliments and we can’t have more than three suggestions. Usually, I want to put NO compliments and FIFTEEN suggestions. However, this is a common courtesy. It can be something as simple as: “The plot is good.” Or even: “I like the character’s names.”
That’s the one I’m going to use in my example critique of my story.
NOTE:Make it specific. “Good story” doesn’t count. Of course, if there’s more you liked, add it. “The characters are so complex.” Say everything you liked about
TIP:Even better, do something even more specific, regarding a particular event. This example was taken from a comment from Lizzie on my story:
Heh. I love Kira's character - "I hate you." "I know you do, sweetie. Have a good time!" xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD That cracked me up.
Rule III: You can say anything you want as long as you phrase it nicely.
Instead of: “This is horrible”…
Write: “The characters and events need to be fleshed out more.”
So, for my story, here’s what I’m going to say to my third grade self so far:
“I like the plot. It’s interesting. But, the characters and events need to be fleshed out more.
Words like however, but or though work good for the first line of CC. Add more if necessary. You can add more here, especially dealing with ‘line critiques’ like misspellings and grammar mistakes. Italicize or bold the typos to emphasize them. Lists are great for multiple line CCs as well. When you copy and paste the text, change the color, font or italicize/bold it.
“I like the plot. It’s interesting. But,the characters and events need to be fleshed out more. The ending also needs to be more satisfying. There are also several typos:
- Cheryl was lonely at first without her playmates, thenshe found some onewhen the pack adopts a wolf pup from another group. There should be a semicolon before then and after playmates. Some one is one word.
- Elfa is spelled ‘alpha’.
- …destroyed in a instant by Kana… Before a noun starting with a vowel, the ‘a’ is changed to an ‘an’.
- Most packs in this area are 7 members to 30. Write numbers up to 100 in word form.”
NOTE:Some authors don’t like line by line grammar edits. Some also don’t seem to change them. I don’t change the typos on my stories- I do it on the actual document. So, don’t be discouraged if your CC seems to go unnoticed.
Rule IV: Wrap it up with fancy wrapping paper and a big bow.
Metaphorically, of course. Say something encouraging: “Keep writing” or “Happy writing” are my personal favorites.
I hoped this guide to CC helped everyone in the community. At least, I hoped my very old work made you either pee your pants laughing so hard or made you nearly have a heart attack at how horrible An Elfa Female Wolf is.
Happy writing!
~Reine~
No comments:
Post a Comment